Thursday, October 2, 2008

The Gift Giver and Reciever Language

The 5 Love Language

Paraphrased from Gary Chapman’s* best selling book

Receiving Gifts: Also known as visual or tangible symbols of love, does the person like to have surprise gifts that are totally unexpected? A personalized gift says that we cared enough to make the effort to bring pleasure to the other person. To be effective the gift must be something that will please the other person. You don't have to go out and spend a lot of money - we just need tangible little remembrances that you are thinking about us even when we are not with you. For example, a card, something you made, a carefully wrapped piece of fudge that you brought home from the office because someone brought it in to work for the group, and you remembered know how much I love fudge. It is especially affecting when the gift is something we have wanted, or is unique to one of our little quirks. You may need to give the gift with a bit of ceremony, so that we know you meant it as a token of love. The gift has to be unconditional with no strings attached, rather than a bargaining tool to get something you want in return.

Other examples include:

  • Your friend sends you something special through the mail just because it made them think of you.
  • Your spouse brings you home a surprise treat from the store.
  • Your partner surprises you with a membership to something you always wanted.
  • Your coworker gives you the gift of time, staying late to help you finish a project.
Your classmate brings extra pens to class knowing you usually forget yours.

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